Second Opinion

Calvin Trillin: Smart guys caused the financial collapse. "When the smart guys started this business of securitizing things that didn't even exist in the first place, who was running the firms they worked for? Our guys! The lower third of the class!" (NYT) RIP: Bruce Wasserstein has died. (WSJ) Taking Credit: David Rubenstein admits that private equity played a role in the crisis. Easy to say now that, according to him, private equity is "back." (WaPo) Just for Fun: Anyone out there need a chart intervention? (Economix) Just so you know: Anthropologists (one, at least) think the modern man is a wimp. "Any Neanderthal woman could have beaten former bodybuilder and current California governor Arnold Schwarzenegger in an arm wrestle." (Reuters)

Goodbye Joe Consumer: "The concept of an 'average American' is gone, probably forever. " (Ad Age) Liquidity Events: Private Equity's Exit Strategies Are A-Changin' (Pitchbook) Help or Hurt? More than half of companies have banned Facebook and Twitter at work. (Wired) Pile On: Another busted LBO that earned its PE backers a profit. (Zero hedge) Oh Dear God: This could be so very ugly. The New York Post reported that Energy Future Holdings, aka TXU, is having problems with the restructuring plan for its debt. (Reuters)

More Lending Thaw Predictions: This week the trigger is CD&R's stake purchase in Johnson Diversey. (AM Law) Steve Schwarzman owns Shamu: The Playgrounds of Private Equity, in which BX's new deal "could also prove to be a roller coaster in terms of value if Americans don't rediscover fun as part of the economic recovery." (Dealzone) At Least Someone is Excited about Private Equity: Guggenheim Investment Advisors LLC, which supervises $50 billion of assets, is renewing interest in private-equity funds after it halted such investments for two years because of concerns asset prices were too high. (Bloomberg) Fuzzy Channel: Citi, others give static to Clear Channel's PE firms. (New York Post) PEC VS NVCA: Have PE lobbyists thrown VCs under the bus? (Dealscape)

How Nonsense Sharpens the Intellect: A study suggests that a feeling of absurdity "may prime the brain to sense patterns it would otherwise miss - in mathematical equations, in language, in the world at large." (WSJ) Thank You: A UK woman is taking up George Carlin's torch, combating nonsensical corporate jargon, including at financial institutions. (WSJ) Continuing Debates: Is Michael Moore a fan of "Blue Bails"? (The Big Money) Grocery Sale: The unnamed PE bidder for grocery store Ukrop's has pulled out of its deal. (Supermarket News via Roanoke Times)

Wishful Thinking or Reality? Restructuring industry firms said they're "bolstering their ranks" for a "sustained demand for their services" over "three to five years." Green shoots, my a**! (Reuters) BX World: Blackstone Investor meetings may very well include appearances from Shamu. The firm is nearing a deal to purchase Seaworld and other theme parks from Anheuser Busch. (WSJ) Moody's in a Bad Mood: And the ratings agency is taking it out on private equity. "Private-equity firms could add more debt to their target companies' balance sheets in order to reap dividends, which could weaken the position of existing bondholders, a report by Moody's Investors Services said on Thursday." (Reuters) Weirdest, Most Random Niche Deal Ever: Riverside Partners acquires a Portugal-based umbilical cord blood collection company. What the heck is that? (peHUB)

Zombie Companies: Companies owned by private equity firms, particularly the number two or three in their sector, are at risk of becoming zombie companies because of their high debt levels and the lack of interest in such firms from equity investors. (Dealzone) MBA Pay: Riches for Some, Not All: Schools publish average salary figures that suggest most grads will reap rich rewards, but for many the "average" is a distant dream (BW) A for Effort/F For Execution: Every buyout firm wants to do loan-to-owns these days, but not many have. (Reuters) (PS Here's some good advice on how one firm made it work.) Icahn To The Rescue: Apollo-backed Realogy is a fixer-upper, and Carl Icahn has tapped Carl Icahn to help it pay down some of its debt. (NY Post) Yesterday we mentioned the NY Mag Expose on the finance blog, Zero Hedge. Today Felix Salmon talked to the author about the backlash he's received for his relatively innocuous but interesting story. (Reuters)

Holy Crap: Details on the private equity coup d'état: Dominique Megret, chief executive officer of PAI Partners, France's biggest private-equity firm, was in his office, a 10-minute walk from Paris's Louvre museum, on July 21 when there was a knock on the door. Lionel Zinsou, who joined PAI Partners from Rothschild a year ago, and partners Raffaele Vitale, based in Milan, and Ricardo de Serdio, from Madrid, walked in and said they and three others would resign from the nine-member investment committee unless Megret gave them more power in running the firm, people familiar with the discussions said. The threat infuriated Megret. Read more at Bloomberg. This has happened to me before: Tale of moron PR pitch. (Dealzone) FT Interviews CalPERS: Two stories came from a chat with Leon Shahinian, manager of PE investments at CalPERS. One's on "irony in the brewing tension between investors and private equity firms", and one's on the "battle over fees." Subpeonas: Did Bank of America destroy Countrywide's predator lender phone calls? (WSJ) Vampire: The makers of Twilight are planning to hire Morgan Stanley to advise it on a potential M&A deal. (NY Post)

Blogger with a Bullet: Who is Zero Hedge and how did his financial blog get so influential? NY Mag writes: "The nothing-can-be-believed chaos of the financial crisis created a golden opportunity for a blog run by a mysterious ex-hedge-funder with a dodgy past and conspiracy theories to burn." (New York Magazine) Rational Irrationality: The real reason that capitalism is so crash-prone, by John Cassidy. (New Yorker) Not Everyone's a Bull: "The party is over. The model is broken. Private equity is dead" (Telegraph) About the Only Thing Going on in Secondaries Right Now: Stanford Management Co., which oversees billions of dollars in assets for Stanford University, has tapped Cogent Partners to gauge investor interest for a possible secondary sale of portions of its alternative investment portfolio. (Private Equity Beat) Silent Partner: Deal Journal thinks that Twitter's exclusion of Morgan Stanley from the list of venture capital firms it received funding from is a diss to Wall Street. (Deal Journal) Trading Barbs: Nassim Taleb didn't is not a fan of Ben Bernanke and Tim Geithner. "Bernanke, Geithner and Summers didn't see the crisis coming so why are they still there?" he said, adding. Bernanke is like "a pilot who didn't see a hurricane." (Bloomberg)

At Work, Are You Trustworthy? A Financier Peels Back the Curtain: More from Guy Hands, on attrition in the buyout industry, the problem with EMI, and a number of other PE-related thoughts. (NY Times) Dealscape isn't as jazzed about the article as others seem to be, and I kinda agree (as, for those frequenting the conference circuit, the interview is no wild revolution in thought leadership. Not to say I don't think Guy Hands is an interesting guy.) (Dealscape) Pessimism in private equity: Almost half of private equity chiefs believe their investors will refuse to meet legally binding commitments to supply the cash for new deals at several high-profile buy-out houses, according to a survey published on Wednesday. (FT) Fooled By Fees: Is it possible that some investors are "fooled" into investing in buyout funds? (All About Alpha via Abnormal Returns)

The Triumph of Web 2.5: The well-deserved success of Mint.com, and what other Web businesses can learn from it. (Slate) Living It Up: Barrett Wissman has not let his involvement in the pay-to-play scandal crimp his lifestyle. "This summer, the 47-year-old held court at a wine-and-music festival he helped found in Cortona, Italy, with a group of high-society friends. There, he interviewed film star Anthony Hopkins, and oversaw a program of cheese tasting, tai chi classes and violin performances." (WSJ) The Yes Men Are Back: Last year they distributed fake NY Times editions which declared the war is over. This year they focused on the climate and the NY Post, declaring "We're Screwed" on the front page. (Huffington Post) Can't Find a Job? Move to China, that's what a host of young people are doing, including one private equity pro. From the San Francisco Examiner: A 28-year-old former London banker took a job a year ago with a Chinese private equity firm after the crisis devastated his industry at home. He said that even though he spoke no Chinese, his experience and contacts made him a sought-after asset in China, a market that he said offers "a much faster route to a top-level position. Speaking of London: The city expects a flux of PE-backed IPOs. (Independent)